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i hate my fucking life. its going terribly wrong right now. first of all, my mom. shes only happy when her fucking boyfriend is around. she favors my little sister over me. nobody in the house respects me. i find myself crying almost everyday, and yelling. and school. if it werent for school, i think i wouldnt want to kill myself now. but i fucking hate school. my math teacher fucking hates me and is a perverted freak. i am an outcast...sort of. i get rejected. alot. by boys, girls, everyone. nobody understands what i am going thru. thats why i go to the computer. everyone in my internet world are friends, and i wish it was like that in real life. i can talk to anyone and they would understand. but people in my school wouldnt. i wish everyone could be more open. i wish i could not have to yell at my sister and end up crying at the end. i wish i could transport myself somehow to where i would like to be. i wanted to go to the beach today, since we never go anywhere, but no. my mom is too fucking lazy. i feel trapped in this world. i seriously want to kill myself. everyone hates me and my attitude. i try real hard to do everything. as i am writing this, i am seriously crying. tears are streaming down my face. nobody can understand what i'm going through, nobody. i feel like i'm alone. i need someone out there who can understand what i'm going through. i feel lost in this world. lost. i'm drifting down. like in alice in wonderland, where she goes down the rabbit hole. thats exactly how i feel.
misfit, freak, weird, outcast, wannabee, poser
all of those names i've been called.
i seriously wish my school exploded and everyone died. happy happy happy.
i'm making this entry non private so other people can reply.
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sailorgrrl's journal
bouncy
nauseated
bored